CATS Review: Someone Please Erase My Memory

CATS is a musical that needs no introduction. Considered the first megamusical, it paved the way for shows from Les Miserables and The Phantom of the Opera to Hamilton and Wicked, on top of being a massive commercial success in its own right. It’s been produced all over the globe in over 15 languages, and broke records for the longest-running show on the West End and Broadway during its original runs. You might remember it most clearly for its horrific 2019 film adaptation, but there are countless ways in which CATS changed the landscape of musical theatre forever.

It’s also – and I can not emphasise this enough – incredibly weird.

With lyrics drawn directly from Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats by T.S. Eliot, the musical follows a tribe of cats, called the Jellicle Cats, as they put on their annual Jellicle Ball, where the Jellicle Leader makes the Jellicle Choice. That is, he selects one Jellicle Cat to send to their Jellicle Death the Heaviside Layer (presumably some kind of kitty heaven) to be reincarnated to live another of their nine Jellicle lives. Being selected for this ritual sacrifice is, of course, a great honour. In a bid to impress the Jellicle Leader and prove themselves worthy, each Jellicle Cat must sing a Jellicle Song at the Jellicle Ball about their particular skills/habits/personality.

The majority of CATS is, therefore, made up of the various cats introducing themselves in song form. Occasionally, this endless exposition is interspersed with sad numbers from the outcast cat, Grizabella. There’s also much talk of the main antagonist, Macavity, whose major act of malice occurs most of the way through Act 2 and is resolved within minutes (though not before we’ve heard a fun jazz duet all about him). To be entirely transparent, the plot is not meant to be the main draw – it’s less about telling a story, and more about staging the most over-the-top, go-big-or-go-home spectacle possible. If you’re craving some kind of deep emotional journey, save your money for RENT instead. I certainly should have.

But if you’re capable of switching off your brain and enjoying the ride, you might just have a ball. CATS is literally larger than life, with a set made up of oversized human objects making the Jellicle Cats seem actually cat-sized. The costumes, wigs, and makeup completely transform the actors into their Jellicle counterparts, leaving them near-unrecognisable. The additional costumes and set pieces used for cockroaches and mice, the battle with the Pollicle Dogs, and the railway train are frankly unnerving to look at, but their cobbled-together look is nonetheless clever, making the plays-within-the-play more believable.

Plus, once you get past the initial unsettling nature of seeing people dressed in Spandex with tails dancing around pretending to be animals, the cast are undeniably stellar. Des Flanagan’s Rum Tum Tugger had the audience in stitches, and Jake O’Brien and Savannah Lind’s mischief as Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer was highly entertaining. Gabriyel Thomas’s performance of the show’s iconic eleven o’clock number ‘Memory’ was simply – forgive me – unforgettable. The massive ensemble made Gillian Lynne’s acrobatic choreography look like a walk in the park, performing perfectly in sync. Unfortunately, the choice to have them also speak important lines in impressive unison made them impossible to understand (and did nothing to make these Jellicles seem less like a terrifying death cult). Nevertheless, the performers made even the strangest numbers worth watching.

On the other hand, many of the visual elements, like the bushels of projected stars every other song, or the oddly-shaped spotlights on Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, felt like they’d be less out of place in Schools Spectacular than a professional mainstage musical. Others were overwhelming, unnecessary, or quickly lost their lustre – there’s only so many onstage fireworks you can set off during one song.

It’s clear to see how the spectacle of CATS wowed audiences at the time of its premiere, but after living plenty more than nine lives, it just feels dated. And with so few theatre spaces in Sydney, it was easy to wonder what I could’ve been watching instead. In the subsequent canon of explosively spectacular, commercially appealing megamusicals, there are countless shows that could take its place. Many of them are still waiting on their Australian premiere (rest in peace to the Everybody’s Talking About Jamie run that never was). Is it time to send this cat to the Heaviside Layer?

All in all, not much could have saved my CATS experience from feeling like some kind of fever dream or psychedelic trip gone wrong. But if that’s something you’re into, more power to you! Catch it playing at the Theatre Royal Sydney until September 6th.